Getting out of your own way... and your comfort zone
Updated: Apr 19, 2020
Last month I launched my private membership group The Leadership Confidential and made what for me was a huge and scary step into the unknown. Coaching and supporting women via an online membership group has been a significant goal of mine for at least a year, and although there is a fair amount of the setting up process that takes time, I discovered that I was feeling a lot of fear.
The fear of it not being good enough. The dread of putting myself out there, the uncertainty that comes from trying something new, the paralysing terror of the unknown.
All of the above were present and I know that we all feel these things when we step out and venture something new. Something different. Something that will invite comments and opinions.
We've all been there haven't we? Negative opinions, destructive comments, unsought for judgements.
But you know what I found? Once I stopped tinkering around with ideas, with over planning and generally just faffing about (procrastinating!) and picked a date to start, it was actually easy. It was still a little bit scary (actually a lot) but doing something was better than feeling anxiety about doing nothing. And it was an improvement on feeling fearful. In actual fact I felt relief.
I was on the road towards something I really wanted and that I knew I could and would serve the women I work with. And it would serve me too. Getting started made me happy.
So what helped? What did I do to overcome my fear and make a move to get started?
Talk about it. Well first of all I started to talk about the membership to people. My friends, colleagues, clients, social media, networking groups. Any one I met who asked how I was and what I was doing heard all about it. I think I'd have stopped people in the street if I thought it was a good idea.
Once I set an intention and a date, the act of simply telling people about my plans and goals made me feel like they were more real and achievable. Telling people helps you be accountable.
Trust yourself. This is huge. Once you have worked out what you want, trust that you can get it done. Despite the feelings of discomfort with not knowing what’s next for you, it’s important to be able to rely on your gut instinct.
If you’re anything like me, you want to be in control and organised, it’s the safer option. To some extent this is necessary. However it’s good to learn how to let go, not to make plans too far ahead and wait for the next chapter to reveal itself.
Which leads to the third thing that helps… Being open to opportunities. One of the best pieces of advice about approaching new things is from Richard Branson; he advocates saying yes when you’re offered an opportunity and concentrate on working out the how later. When I’m coaching this is effective when helping clients explore what’s possible and allowing them to be able to “dance in the moment” and see where it leads.
And finally relax...Reconnect to what fulfils you, what you value the most and what makes you happy. Whatever those things are for you, spending time with loved ones, having the kitchen to yourself or going dancing. If it's something that makes you happy, work out how to make time to do more of whatever that is.
And that's why I'm happy to be now offering online coaching and training through my membership group. My mission is to help women who are striving for more, yet lack that confidence and belief in themselves to step into the unknown. The modern workplace is improving for women everyday but often it’s simply not the place to get the individual support and guidance we need to progress our careers, our goals and our wants.
Usually workplace place objectives are just that; they're linked to company goals and objectives. But what about your goals, your dreams? What about the leader you want to be? What support are you getting for yourself?
The success you want in your career that might not be possible where you're working now.
I wanted a way to bring great, inspiring and unique women together, to not only gain the techniques and coaching they need to go for more but also to become a sisterhood, to connect and help each other. That's what The Leadership Confidential is. A place that will help bridge the gap between what you want and where you want to be, by giving you the support to be the best you can be.
So contact me now to chat about what's possible for you with The Leadership Confidential and get started today.
The main thing I've learned is that it's not about making mistakes, it’s about making progress and taking steps towards what matters to you and what you dream for yourself in your life.